Take It or Leave It
My real attitude towards women and dating
Where my experiences diverge the most from the majority of lower-status males is probably in the sexual aspect. As Vox tells us, OMEGAS are either two things with women; indifferent or extremely hateful. I fall thoroughly into the former category. Reviewing my high school or middle school history reveals no hurtful rejections, failed attempts, first kisses, first dates, sexual encounters, or anything you might expect to see in the romantic or sexual life of a young male. I do not harbor any of those old wounds you can so often see in the DELTAS and GAMMAS. There are no girls from that era I am still pining for and whose memory haunts me to this day.
As detailed further in this article, my formative years were mostly spent battling school and mental illness simultaneously. There simply was not much energy or time left for anyone or anything else. Moreover, there was no peer pressure to encourage or punish me for failing to have a girlfriend because I persistently chose to avoid most people. As hard as it can be for many to imagine, school was almost entirely an asexual experience.
It is not that I did not feel sexually attracted to some girls. On the contrary, there were two or three that stuck out as being particularly attractive. My first and only move towards one of them was in middle school with an anonymously written Valentine’s Day card. Not surprisingly, nothing ever came of it - and she actually turned out to be a lesbian who was just very feminine. One time, she complained about me in class which hurt my feelings a bit. That is my entire history with anything close to dating or being rejected.
This natural apathy with women has carried on past school and into the present day. Considering I still spend so much time alone, it gets easier and easier to forget about dating, marriage, and sex entirely. My thought process is something like: if I really want it in the future, I will try, but only with really attractive women who are actually worth pursuing. The wisdom for lower-status men is to pursue women close to you in terms of attractiveness, but that just isn’t motivating. I would much rather be permanently celibate than have to hook up with a 6 out of some kind of desperation. Some readers may scoff at this, because they see me as not in a position to make such demands, but it is important to remember that I really just don’t care that much. With redpill knowledge circulating and the downsides of marriage, especially today, becoming more apparent, is is truly something I could just take or leave at this point.
This experience and disposition will naturally be hard for most men to empathize with. Some readers may be wondering how this disposition could even come about. While it is beyond the scope of this article, there were incidents with women in my pre-pubescent childhood that may have shaped this attitude. You could say I have an arrested development of sorts because of this.
Unlike what I suspect from a lot of people here, I actually have lots of experience noticing and being around Omegas due to two circumstances in my life putting them in my sphere. Also unlike what I suspect from most here, I actually was able to get along with both quite well and observe more about them than most others cared to.
So when I push back from the other commenters and say that I understand what you're describing when you say that you'd strongly prefer to leave hope for a marital future behind, I really mean it. I feel like most people simply can't comprehend just how staggeringly difficult something like achieving success with a woman 7+ would seem for you.
Note, I'm not saying that you shouldn't pursue this. I'm simply empathizing and actually listening and believing what you're saying. People should try doing that more often.
Additionally, from my experience with Omegas, including one more on the indifferent rather than repulsive side, I can add my two cents for the other readers that most people simply can't comprehend what living with that level of social isolation is like. Let alone how daunting success with a 7+ is to consider. Going from having any conversations at all to considering talking to a 7+ isn't a small matter.
All that being said, I would say only one thing additionally. I still second the commenter above when I say that you never know what God has in store for you. The God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob is a God of miracles. With the strength from Jesus Christ, all things can be possible. The scriptures teach us to multiply and replenish the earth. Maybe you would find that, as you get closer to God and learn to recognize His will for you, He will teach you that He intends to raise you from the dust and arrange the circumstances for marriage to be possible for you.
But this is not really my business because I'm not you. It is between you and God alone.
In any case, Godspeed with all of the efforts you are making!
You're clearly not indifferent towards women if you're willing "to make the effort" for an 8+woman.
This SSH-stuff is great and useful, but it only goes so far, especially regarding self-improvement. At some point there will be only one person who can help you: Jesus Christ
It seems you've reached that point, because saying "I'm indifferent to women, but I'd pursue a really pretty one" is nonsense. And it doesn't make it any less nonsensical by playing the victim-card: "I'm an OMEGA! I'm allowed do that!"
I cannot stress enough how life-changing it is for a man to begin following the Son of God!